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« Lake Hamilton Junior High School | Main | You are now niche »

March 30, 2005

Comments

Harold Jarche

Great idea. I've played with it a bit:

http://www.jarche.com/node/view/484

Nate

How about:

People in networked schools have figured out that they get far better information and support from one another than from vendors. So much for corporate rhetoric about adding value to commoditized products.

Becomes:

People in networked schools have figured out that they get far better information and support from one another than from teachers. So much for educational rhetoric about adding value to education.

Nate

And:
In just a few more years, the current homogenized "voice" of learning — the sound of mission statements and brochures — will seem as contrived and artificial as the language of the 18th century French court.

Becomes:
In just a few more years, the current homogenized "voice" of learning — the sound of learning objectives and outcomes — will seem as contrived and artificial as the language of the 18th century French court.

Nate

And:
By speaking in language that is distant, uninviting, arrogant, they build walls to keep schools at bay.

Becomes:
By speaking in language that is distant, uninviting, arrogant, they build walls to keep students at bay.

Nate

· Schools do not want to talk to flacks and hucksters. They want to participate in the conversations going on behind the corporate firewall.

Re-phrased:

Students do not want to talk to flacks and hucksters. They want to participate in the conversations going on behind the institutional firewall.

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